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While scanning through polyvore, I just realised that there was a set that I wanted to post here but then somehow I didn’t get around really doing this. While working at the library one or two weeks ago, I discovered that I can access polyvore on my work pc (many pages are disabled there). So, being at university, I thought I might as well do a day-to-day university outfit.

I really like how it came out and would love to wear it. What do you think?

Seeing this outfit reminds me that I desperately need a new pair of jeans, but so far, I haven’t seen anything I liked. And usually, if I do, they don’t fit or have horrible back pockets or strange colour details… Shopping for jeans really IS a pain!

Back

Since I forgot to give a note of absence, I thought I might at least say hello now that I’m back.

I’ve been at my mums place for the weekend, park feast at the village I come from. It was okayish, eventhough I realised once again that I don’t really feel home there anymore. Maybe I’ve been away for too long, held a grudge against the place for too many years. I don’t know.

I hope to be back with more fashionable postings soon.

Goldilocks-look

A picture I came across yesterday and a post from the always wonderful une femme inspired me to write some words on what I’d like to achieve once I’ve gone through the make over I want this summer to be.

french04picture via: design is mine

Even a little sketch can convey it. The ‘oh so french’ feeling that has you wishing imidiately that it could be so easy to look put together without trying too hard. Or at least it has me. French woman seem to have this. You look at them, and they radiate confidence and style. Everything about them usually looks just about right, as if it could not be any different.  It’s like our universe that’s called a Goldilocks universe, just because everything is just about right for us to exist.

What I hope to achieve is a look that is true to myself. True to the woman I feel I have become, true to my taste and to my body. If one day I manage to look like what I’m wearing was the obvious choice, because it is simply me and makes me look and act confident, then I’ll be fashionably happy.

Now I know that a good appearance will not solve any inner conflicts. It will not help to make your life any more productive if along with the outward changes there’s nothing going on on the inside. But that’s not what it’s about. I’ve been able to chase away many of the demons of the past. Yet, often I feel insecure or just not too happy when I’m out and about, simply because I feel that inside and outside are not in accordance. I’m not looking like me.

Yesterday, when I came back from the movies, I looked at a reflection of myself in the window of the tube and though: gosh, how boring. That’s not what I want to look like. That’s not me. I’m not boring. I’ve never been. I’m a pretty lively person, I love getting to know new things and new people, I’m open and I’m curious. I have my downs, but we all do, and they need not reflect on the outside.

Usually, the great make overs that you can see in newspapers or tv go like this: someone transforms his or her outside, and miraculously, the change on the inside follows suit. I’m not sure I’m buying that. While your outward change might help the matter, I don’t think it’s the key to get to terms with yourself entirely.

For me, it is the other way round. I’ve worked my way through many downs and in the end, came out of them. They are not all gone. They never will be. But I’m far from the young depressed girl that used to shield herself with harshness from the world just to have those walls come crashing down once alone somewhere. I’m probably the most positive, most head on and softest version of myself I’ve ever been, and I like that.

And I want it to show. I will tackle the task to bring out my personal french self, the Goldilocks-look. I think I chose the right name after all.

Belle IS  a telling name in this respect, isn’t it?

change

There is a lot going on here right now. I’ve started to change around small things in my daily routines and hope they’ll soon gain momentum. I’ve achieved nothing big, it’s all tiny steps but I’ve learned from former mistakes. I can’t have everything at once. You have to take life’s challenges one step at a time and that’s what I’ll do.

For the moment, I’ve set myself four goals, two of them regarding my eating habbits and two of them regarding general organisation in my life.

#1 Track all food eaten every day to get an idea of where the pitfalls are and what excactly needs to be changed around for a healthy (and for the beginning, weight-loss supporting) diet.

#2 Track water consumed. Aim at at least 2 l a day.

#3 Track money spend,  and by that I mean: every single cent. My money runs out like there’s no tomorrow and I’m determined to stop that.

#4 Don’t go to bed before the kitchen is tidy and shiny. A messy kitchen usually is what leads me to skip breakfast or not prepare decent meals.  So this obstacle has to be removed by habit, too.

For the first two weeks, I think this is enough to take on. Once I developed routines there, I’ll have time to think about new ones. Also, in about two weeks time, term break starts, which basically means I’m a lot more free when it comes to organising my days.

Concerning my daily water intake, I finally bought a waterfilter. I usually do drink tab-water. It’s good quality, but the problem is that it’s extremely calciferous, which lead to a strange taste. Filtered, it’s great though, and so much cheaper than bottled water. Better on the environment, too. What I need to do next is buying a decent reusable water bottle, I’m sick and tired of those plastic bottles. They get pretty yuckie fast plus are also not excactly green.

The other thing that’s ahead is that I finally decided to get myself a bio-box. That’s basically a weekly delivery of fresh fruits and vegetables from a nearby farm. It’s not really more expensive than buying the stuff in store, it’s very likely to be better quality plus it’s deliverd regularly to my place. You can’t argue with that. I just don’t know when I’ll start to order the box yet, because I’ll be away for two or three times during the next month. But it’s definitely comming.

I shared my goals with a friend today, who’ll check back on me every now and then to keep me under controle and on track.

I’m determined to make those changes work, and to take the right decisions along the way.

Inspiration

10.07original sources at vi.sualize.us

I’m all out of clever things to write about. I actually do have some ideas sketched on my notebook, but I lack time and concentration to really come up with something worth reading, so I thought I might as well leave you with some inspiring pictures. I lately discovered vi.sualize.us, which really comes in handy to store all the nice pictures one finds spread across the net in one place without making one’s hard drive a total picture mess. A nice tool, especially for blogging people.

Since it’s all grey and rainy and windy outside, I was looking for pictures with a warm, summery athmosphere, so I might at least imagine it was a cozy summer night.

icons

jean seberg1

I’ve lately fallen in love with Jean Seberg.

Her tragic history saddens me, though. I like just to look at her and imagine her happy.

rainy day

It’s all grey and rainy outside. Which doesn’t really matter because I’ll have to work. Of course I procrastinated for 90 minutes longer than I wanted to and am just about to start some serious work.

But what can you do when Polyvore is asking for your attention? It’s my personal way of scrapbooking and I’ll for sure take this one into my lookbook and make a nice scrap-page out of it. Tonight!

I’d rather cuddle up on the sofa with my book and a can of tea, but what can you do when duty is calling?

I love my studies. So finnishing this essay is NOT a burden. I just have to remind myself of that every now and then.

But well, there you go: let’s beat the rain in style!